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Middle-aged people continue to grow

04-02 BigMediumSmall I want to comment

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Famous Mental Health Counselor Mike Bonderland

Developmental psychologists believe that people grow up at all stages, but the ways to achieve happiness vary greatly. For middle-aged people, what makes you happy when you are young may not be applicable at this stage. When you discover what you really need at this stage, you can get the key to happiness and continue to grow.

1. Understand your inner needs. Compare these two views: "I can do my best", "I want to do better than others, I want to win success". Both attitudes are correct, but the latter is more suitable for young people who need recognition, while middle-aged people need a quiet heart, can understand themselves, know that their efforts are unique. In middle age, it's time to throw away the measured panic. You can use your talents without worrying about other people's better performance. You don't have to prove yourself to the world anymore. You can concentrate on what you think is meaningful and reap inner satisfaction.

2. Restrain material desire. Long time pursuit of material is not a good way to seek happiness. When we were young, we pursued cars, houses, clothing, jewelry... But when we put all our trust in matter, once we reach our goal, it is easy to be empty. In middle age, most people already have some economic foundation. At this time, they should stop at material pursuit and not be burdened by it. Middle-aged people need to seek spiritual sustenance and happiness from the perspective of life meaning.

3. No more confrontation with authority. Young people tend to be arrogant and even despise their superiors. But in middle age, people with certain career experience should understand that there is no need to spend more time proving that you are more capable and smarter than some authorities, which has many advantages. 1. You can relax a little, just do your own work; 2. Concentrate on doing your own work better; 3. You can win the trust of your superiors in any unit; 4. Take full responsibility for your actions. When you are no longer so competitive, innate talent will naturally emerge.

4. Face the board straight. Visionary people dare to admit their shortcomings and know that their strengths and weaknesses are closely linked. For example, some people lose many opportunities because they are not good at socializing when they are young, but as they grow older, they realize that it is because they do not like socializing that they prefer to immerse themselves in reading, so they have deeper insights and become a rare "thinker" in the unit. Face your shortcomings, you will feel more comfortable, will actively seek the balance of advantages and disadvantages, more aware of what you can do, can not do, so as to enhance strengths and avoid weaknesses.

5. Learn to say no. It's time to draw a line between things you don't want to touch. Doing everything you do will only break you down. Middle age is coming and you need to simplify your life. I don't want to go to this party, I don't agree with this point of view, I can't lend you my car, I don't want to lend you my money, I don't like this movie very much... It's important to know who you are and what you want, to be an honest and trustworthy person, and to be able to say "no". You may offend some people, but since you don't know your people, you don't have to care too much.

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